Light in the heart of darkness

A friend recently gave me an unusual compliment: "you’re able to look into the heart of darkness". They were commenting on how I’d dealt directly with difficult and sometimes harmful relationships in my life. 

 

I didn’t just march in with Dutch courage and hope that I’d blunder my way through. I’d paced my action to be measured and sensitive to my needs and others so that I found healthy relief. It’s a relief that is enduring. The compliment had me reflecting on what is the power and benefit in looking at darkness. 

 

 

In EFT we address the harmful issues that come up with a certain level of directness. In the Setup we address an aspect of the problem, rather than paper over it in the hopes it’ll magically disappear. Where there’s much pain, we gently creep up on the issue until we’re ready to deal with the heart of darkness. We allow gentleness and compassion to steer our progress. With this approach we’re more likely to bring light to the dark emotions people feel held back by.

 

So with synchronicity, in the run up to this newsletter, a reader contacted me to start to make sense of the darkness they were experiencing in the loss of a still born baby. They already value the benefits of EFT. They wanted to know how such a tragic event could happen in the light of law of attraction principles. 

 

Instead of pushing my personal beliefs on them I asked them to gently tap on the grief that was coming up. I suggested they take their time, and it’s ok at some stage to find blame and anger coming up to then be tapped on.  I suggested that as they worked through each layer of negative emotion arising from this distressing event they would come closer to their own truth about what had happened. 

 

When we feel able to deal with a dark area of our lives, we are not indulging ourselves by handling it. Neither are we going to create more of the same. This is because we’re going in with the intention of finding relief – that is the central tenet behind EFT. That healing intention allows us to create more and more relief. It also allows us to uncover our own truth.  

 

If you look at where grief and knowledge sit on the Emotional Guidance System, you’ll see they are at opposite ends of the scale. We’re unlikely to find our full truth about a subject if we’re still holding onto fear, guilt or worry. Instead we can make peace with the past by taking a planned and supported journey into the darkness and the relief beyond.  From there we can move to a powerful place of freedom.